Finding Silver Linings

In keeping with a “no luck” week that started with a double dose of skunk sprayed dog, and a shoulder injury, my shoulder MRI showed I had a complete tear of the main muscle in my rotator cuff, needing surgical repair.  I am now status post surgery followed by 6 weeks of right arm immobilization in a sling.  I am told I will be restricted from lifting anything more than 5 pounds with my right hand for at least 4-6 months and can expect it to be a year before I am at peak function.  At first a year to heal seemed crazy, but I have come to accept that timeline, as my body reminds me regularly that healing is going to be a long, slow process. Even now, at least a couple of times a day I run up against a previously simple movement that is now painful or impossible to do. For example, you would be surprised how hard it is to stir cookie or bread dough with a healing rotator cuff.  To help the recovery process along, I have been attending physical therapy twice weekly for the past 4 weeks and expect that to continue for at least a couple more months.  Because I am committed to doing everything I can to get back to my “normal” activity level, I have been religious about doing my PT homework, and overall, it has been going well, despite my well-meaning home PT assistant, also known as Willow.  She often wants to join me on the yoga mat for the exercises.  However, as a physical therapy assistant, she is not so great!  She seems particularly fascinated by the elastic resistance bands, and there have been a few times when I thought I was going to have to tell Rachel, the human PT assistant who is guiding my exercise and stretching routines, that the dog ate my homework.  But in Willow’s defense, her antics are always good for a smile, so maybe her calling is as an emotional support dog instead.

In terms of things I can’t do, my biggest challenges are all the things at the farm that involve lifting, particularly working with the bees.  I REALLY don’t like asking for help, but I have no choice if I am going to continue to care for my bees and the other animals at the farm. And, thanks to a nudge from Ned, a consultant for AgrAbility (USDA-supported program that helps farmers, ranchers, and agricultural workers with disabilities or chronic health conditions continue working in agriculture safely and effectively), I have had to acknowledge the fact that part of how I navigate this injury and recovery depends on my mind set!  When I lamented to him that I was facing my largest honey harvest ever, making it totally the WORST time to be injured and unable to work my hives, he pointed out that having my largest harvest ever was just what I needed this year to help offset the cost of having to hire help.  His comment helped me step back and remind myself that I am the one who determines if I view all of this as a glass half empty or a glass half full.  I decided that my road to recovery would be better served by focusing on the glass half full, or as I like to think about it, the silver linings of this forced change in my routine.  From spending some extra time with my daughter, who helped at markets as I first navigated what I could or couldn’t do following surgery, to my physical therapy team, to the people who have stepped up to become my strong arms and back for beekeeping, and other farm chores, I have had the opportunity to share time with some amazing people, both established friends and family (Gary, Carla, Barbara, Char, Steve, Cameron), who have given me the gift of their time and help, and new acquaintances (Ned, Margaret, Allie, Adyaan, Sarah, Annaliese, Rachel). Add to them all the vendors at my farmer’s markets, both friends and new acquaintances, who jump in every week to help me unload, get set up, take down and reload.  With the help of my helpers, I am learning to be patient with the healing process, to accept help and to remember that life is full of silver linings, if you look for them!